Twat Stamp

I am sitting outside my place of biznass (soon to be former place of biznass), leaning against the wall and stealing internets from the restaurant next door. I have to do this because there is no wireless connection at my work place because they are afraid we will contact someone in cyberspace and ask for help.

So I come out here and every fucking day this girl walks by in platform shoes with this giant smile on her face. I have no idea why she is smiling, ever, about anything and everything. I would call this a “shit-eating grin,” because that’s what it is.

The other day, I was sitting here and some girls in jewel-toned lycra-blend knit sun dresses pulled up in an SUV and climbed out with their sparkly handbags, ready for a day of shopping. When they realized that the parking meter accepted credit cards, the one in the shortest dress walked back to the SUV, which was in the parking spot directly in front of me. She opened the door, then stood on the curb and bent at the waist to lean across the seats for the pocket on the back of the driver’s seat. Her dress was very short. She was not wearing ANY underwear, not tiny underwear, or a trace of underwear, NON-EXISTENT underwear.

I saw her vagina.

In full view.

On my lunch break.

It was really weird and scraggly and I thought someone (or everyone) should know.

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